What A Night of Puking Taught Me

Stretched out over the toilet after my most recent stomach hurl, I had to remind myself "This is the worst it feels, it gets better right after you puke."

It was my 6th, or 7th vomit of the night, and I was tired, wondering, "What the heaven is going on?" It had been over 7 years since I last puked from anything other than a night of drinking (University...)

Fast forward 12 hours, and I've had lots of time to contemplate, as I laid in my bed. In hopes of getting clarity on what was going on, I texted my mom first thing this morning, and she asked me "What makes you feel so vile you need to puke?" and I knew instantly - environmental pollution. Consistent chemicals, fear, and anger being sent towards the Earth. It had been building up for a few days, and apparently my body couldn't take it anymore. It needed to release.

And that's when I realized. This isn't working. My outlook isn't working. I can't continue to see smog, ignorance, greed, and poison affecting our planet, or I'll end up with many more days of illness and anger.

Perspective is everything. Sometimes I find it so easy to look at the world with love and light, and other times, like today, all I see is fear and it makes me feel constricted, like I don't know what to do and have nowhere to go.

Can you relate? Maybe your crutch isn't the environment, but poverty, abuse, or greed. Maybe you didn't puke because of it, but you feel sad inside, empty, as if you can't escape the so called "realities" of this world.

But there is a better way. A change of perspective is everything, and though it's hard, it's the only thing that will save us, it's the only thing that will save this beautiful planet. We must be committed to seeing the world with light, even in the midst of such darkness. We must find the beauty in the moment.  We must change what we see before what we see changes.

I'm choosing to do this today through commitment to a better way, affirmations, and prayer. I know that when I make a step, the Universe responds to me tenfold. What is your plan of action? How will you overcome darkness and climb to higher thoughts? Meditation, a phone call with a close friend, a funny movie? Whatever it may be, do it with love, and do it now. The world needs your light, and so do I.

We're in this together, friends.

xo Beth

Ps. Please read this wonderful blog by Gabby Bernstein if you related to this blog.

My 'Aha' Moment - Mother Earth Style

I had an 'aha' moment on the bus ride out to Tofino recently. I'm reading a book right now called 'Serpent of Light' - it's about the Earth's energy systems and the shifts it's going through right now. In it, there was a line that drastically shifted my understanding of who the Earth really is.

"...{It was a} beginning of a new cycle of life for her dear body, the Planet Earth."

This idea that Mother Earth is first and foremost a Spirit with a body, just as we are. Such an obvious concept to some, maybe, but understanding this had such profound implications for me. A few things came to mind upon this understanding.

a) If you're getting to know someone, and want to connect, you're not going to pick and prod at their cuticles, analyze their hair, and zone in on their skin to find the true them. Of course not! You're going to listen to them, look them in the eyes. You're going to speak to them, ask them questions, and ask them to hang out in order to get to know them better.

Same with Mama Gaia. In the past, I've often touched tree bark, felt the ocean and the wind, and looked at those interactions as the ultimate way to connect. While those things are absolutely fabulous, the most important part of any relationship isn't the physical. I now see that it's key to not only enjoy the Earth's beauty, but to look past it, into her spirit. This spirit can be found just as easily on an elevator ride as in a grand forest if you know how to invoke it.

b) Just as when our body dies, our spirits live on, when Gaia's body dies, her spirit lives on. What an interesting idea - if we end up trashing the earth to the point where we kill her body, her spirit will live on. Where would it go? Good question - perhaps a distant area of the cosmos, perhaps she would incarnate as new planet, a star, or maybe she would simply live in the Spirit world, giving love and guidance to all those who call upon her.

But personally, I'd rather not see her go. I really love all the support and beauty the Earth has provided me and so many trillions of other life forms. Let's, then, help to heal her.